Mermaiding and Sweet Lolita Fashion!
I have really loved getting into Gyaru but I have sucked at nails and lashes which are huge parts of the style so I just wanted to show off my first successful nail set that didn’t immediately pop off! Also here’s the tutorial I followed!
I got these at the dollar store and the design started fading after 3 days but it was totally worth it for a practice round! So if you’re struggling with a new thing you want to try don’t give up!
I thought it’d be fun to write a quick lighthearted halloween candy ranking list! Since I like a lot of unusual candies people loved trading with me.
1.) Whoppers
My favorite halloween candy by far were this malt balls! Everyone always seemed to hate them in my neighborhood so trading for them was a cinch. I always ended up with a huge bag full.
2.) Reese’s Cups
These were pretty popular so trading was a lot harder for these than the previous ones but they are a delicious classic. I always liked the pumpkin ones
3.) Junior Mint’s
These were pretty rare to get but I adored the mini boxes that would be there
4.) Twix bars!
I loved twix bars and in my neighborhood where I grew up these were the most likely to have full size versions
5.) Dark Chocolate Milky Ways!
I loved these! Caramel is a big favorite of mine
I really adored trick or treating younger and I had a great time! My favorite costume I ever did was Alice in Wonderland with a group of friends my freshman year of high school which was the last year I ever trick or treated. Thanks for reading!
🎃 Go looking for the perfect sweater to pair with coords through the cold months, eliminating the choice between being cold or fashionable
🎃 Find cute halloween themed accessories at the store! If your fashion is on the sweet or spooky cute side I have found some surprisingly wonderful accessories at the dollar store and pharmacy this time of year.
🎃 Give orange a chance! It’s the most underrated color in egl in my opinion and instantly gives a spooky but festive vibe to any coord
🎃 Carve pumpkins to get into the Halloween spirit! Maybe carve a cute cat or an elegant design!
🎃 Try making your own pumpkin spice mix and use it to bake or make your lattes at home!
🎃 Wear as many gothic or gothic inspired coords as you can this month!
🎃 Watch Creepy Cute Movies like Coraline or anything done by Tim Burton, the Nightmare Before Christmas is my personal favorite
Well, hello everyone! It’s been a long while. I took some time off of some parts of the web in order to recalibrate but I am very happy to be back in time for the month of Halloween! I have big plans this month, I will be participating in Vlogtober again so if you want to see daily video content from me please checkout my Tiktok (@lilianarowena) or Youtube (Liliana Rowena)
Here’s my Must Do list for this month
🎀 Raid the store for early Halloween Candy and save some for props to take pics for October ahead of time
🎀 Try a new fragrance in your home depending on where you live and your mood you could go with a nice coconut or start moving towards cinnamons and spices
🎀 Give foraging a chance and look for edible plants in your neighborhood, it’ll help you feel like a frolicking maiden
🎀 If it’s safe to do so in your area look to see if there’s places you can give back to or volunteer if time or money allows
🎀 Find a new cute game you can play on your nights in be it a board game or video game to save some money on going out
🎀 As the changes of the seasons are coming upon us soon, go through your closet and sell or donate any pieces that you don’t see yourself wearing next summer, anything else that won’t work going into fall or winter can go into storage
🎀 Invite a friend over and have tea together and chat
🎀 Take advantage of any back to school sales of dorm decor to find cute decorations for your home at a good price. I find target is great to find pastel organizers if your aesthetic is on the sweet side
We have all seen it, the leaving lolita sales, or long winded posts about why people have to leave, but why does it happen so often in egl? To be fair I haven’t spent a lot of time in other alternative fashion spaces, and as far as gyaru goes I am a complete and total beginner. But I have been actively participating in the lolita community for around five years now and it is an amazing phenomena to me that this community seems to engender burnout in its own unique way.
Why is this? I have a few theories of what could be contributing to this. I haven’t done any studies so all that follows is merely opinion based on some observations I have made throughout the years. One of the things I think leads to members leaving so drastically is the sheer high maintenance of the fashion itself in a lot of ways. The clothing is expensive and taking care of it will either take a lot of energy or a lot of money and for a lot of people you can be pretty short on both. Most lolita fashion events in order to protect the communities integrity and safety require that you have at least one coord you can wear to go to that event, so if you run out of energy or money to care for your clothing, selling it off is a good option. However if an individual sells off all of their clothes than they no longer have a wardrobe to wear to events and if they wish to start over that is a daunting task, as wardrobes take years to build. Especially if you are on a budget
The second theory I have on why I see the burnout rate in lolita fashion being so high is because of what I will dub the “small town effect” egl is a group of extraordinarily passionate people but in the grand scheme of things and subcultures it is an amazingly small subset of the alternative fashion community as a whole. Also, egl is a very internet based subculture, we take the time to meet in person and do a lot of in person events however this means that there is eyes constantly on what’s being talked about online. This encourages lolitas to share their journeys with the world but there is always a risk of being posted to sites specifically to belittle the work they have done by people who they will never know who it is. This is a lot of pressure to be under and it can be really overwhelming especially for younger members of the community.
There are other factors that go into play here, but these are the two big pieces I see factor into people deciding to end their lolita fashion journey. There is nothing wrong with your fashion journey growing and changing with you and if one day you completely grow out of egl or you wear it to your grave there is no shame in either path. What breaks my heart is seeing people who are still so in love with the fashion still have to painfully leave it behind. Here is some of my tips I want to share to try to prevent that from happening, so that when or if it comes time for you to move on you’ll be able to leave with fond memories of this wonderful fashion you dedicated part of your life to.
My first tip is to never collect more pieces than you can maintain, regular closet cleanouts and selling what no longer fits your body or style can help you attain this to prevent yourself from having overwhelm. Remember with clothing care you will either spend money or energy maintaining it. If you don’t have a lot of disposable income on the regular you can always handwash your clothes however remember that this will cost you energy. If you don’t have a lot of disposable energy you can pay to have your clothes taken care of and maintained for you but this will cost money. Make sure that you keep within both of resources so that your wardrobe can remain a joy and not a burden
My second tip is to build egl into your budget so that you know what you can spend on it and it won’t be a financial burden on you. This isn’t something I’m an expert on but I will link a video that I find supremely helpful from someone with more experience with money than me here.
My third tip is that it’s okay to take breaks from the fashion from time to time if you need to, it will be there when you come back, your physical, mental and financial health come first.
My fourth tip is to if possible connect with your local comm and try to focus more of your energy into your irl comm than you do the online comm. Egl on the internet is a very complicated place and it can drain a lot of the passion and energy that you have for the fashion if you keep looking in places filled with negativity. People behind screens can’t see you and your reactions and the layer of anonymity means people might say things that they normally wouldn’t say. That being said, it is 100% okay to make online friends and reach out to individuals on accounts and work with those seeking to build more positive community online in egl spaces that work is important and will help combat on a community level the burnout many individuals in this fashion face.
My fifth tip is to stop seeking perfection, it is of course totally fine to want to improve your art in your coords as I see each of our outfits as wearable art that we transform into our own masterpieces with each coord that we build, but it can be easy to give into constant self critique and never really allow yourself to love what you’re wearing. Allow yourself to love your clothes and your fashion.
This is my first month participating in the bibliotecha blogging circle and I am so grateful that I was accepted to join! This months theme was self care! If you would like to check out all of the other wonderful bloggers and subscribe to a monthly newsletter click on the link down below
https://www.bayareakei.org/bibliotheca
Plan a day trip to somewhere beautiful and have a photoshoot in a coord you’re really proud of
Go out for ice cream and eat it in the park enjoying every bite!
Buy some sparklers and see how many shapes and sparkles you can make
Make a video/album of your adventures this month, just for your own memories with no pressure to post it anywhere
Try on a neon accessory with an outfit to reflect all the bright colors of the season!
See how many different kinds of flowers you can find in your town this month, try to identify what they are
Find some cotton candy and a fun outdoor activity and have your own mini fair
I have talked about this multiple times on this blog and will continue to as I am still learning and trying to share my learning journey with you all. Money is hard for me and I have really expensive hobbies with lolita fashion probably being my most expensive hobby. I think it’s pretty well known in the community that lots of lolitas struggle with impulse buys and emotional spending. I don’t think it’s talked about nearly enough in our community and I want to add to the conversation in a productive and realistic manner.
I tried to go on a low-buy this year, it was one of my new year’s resolutions and I failed it spectacularly. I tried to commit to only buying accessories and only buying things under 25$, I was able to stick to this for about 4 months and then I went on a lacemarket binge. I bought a ton of things in a row far exceeding that 25$ budget. I felt so ashamed but still enjoyed what I had received. I decided to talk to my fiance about it because I wanted to get a handle on my money while still enjoying myself. I think that complete drop in my spending just spilled over into other things and then into one big buying spree.
I had heard of that happening when people decided to try to do low buys in finances but had convinced myself that it wouldn’t happen to me because I was only doing it in one category, but the category I had chosen was the one I got the most joy from. I think it could have worked for a different person but it just didn’t work for me. I did learn a ton from the experience though, I learned that I am a collector. I get enjoyment from collecting things and I think a better way to save space in my wardrobe and money in my wallet is to think of alternatives instead of restrictions. I have been really into gyaru lately so I’ve been collecting press ons every paycheck, and also I will open a separate account for my “fun” spending so that I can buy a new JSK from time to time without worry or go on a trip and know I have all the money I need for my bills.
This is an ongoing journey and I know my current system won’t be perfect but I think it’s important to talk about taking responsibility for your finances while still enjoying this fashion and lifestyle, it can add up super quickly if you aren’t careful. Best of luck and I hope all reading this have a wonderful day!
In the year 2020 traditional blogging like this isn’t as popular as it once was, back when I first joined lolita fashion even 5 years ago. I was never truly a part of the livejournal days but blogging like this seems like it has always been an important and key part of lolita fashion. My favorites back in the day were ParfaitDoll, FYeahLolita, Lace A La Mode, and Vanilla Bear. It seems like once upon a time almost everyone was running a blog of some kind. Nowadays a lot of those blogs are full of broken links and images, and some entire websites are now only to be found on the wayback machine. In many ways it feels like an era is over, and I suppose in some ways it is. However I don’t think it may be entirely in the way one would think.
This community, at least in the west has always been very online. It’s how I met a lot of my current friends and how I continue to meet new people. Lolita Fashion’s online presence means a lot to me and I love being a part of it. I know I am not the only one who feels that way, I see egl blossoming in popularity online nowadays that I could have only dreamed of when I first started. In many ways it’s more accessible than ever to become a lolita and it shows. I love the influx of new people and it being a very different tune than the obligatory lolita fashion is dying posts that were popular when I first joined, my comm is the largest it has ever been.
I think lolita blogs didn’t die but more transformed into their own versions across all sorts of different websites, namely on YouTube, Instagram and Tiktok. The internet is a far more visual place than it used to be so I think content creators have simply adapted with the times. I mainly run this blog cause I’m nostalgic for the days before I had a single piece to my wardrobe scouring blogs for every scrap of info on the fashion I so desperately longed to a part of and I think that this blog is in some ways my way of reliving that. I think as long as lolita fashion exists as a subculture we will continue to create online to connect and share our experiences with each other. That’s a truly beautiful thing.
I have never been the type who is able to settle, I’m always looking for the next biggest and brightest thing! My last job I thought that I had finally found my place for the first couple months but then as always the cracks began to show. I work somewhere meant to help people start their lives but everywhere I turned it seemed like some new thing was holding them back. I didn’t want to admit it but I was slowly coming to resent my work the way I had everywhere I had worked. Honestly I think work isn’t for me, I honestly don’t know who it is for. My dream is to be able to create content full time but I don’t know if that will ever become a fully realized reality for me. For now I suppose I’m searching for something that I can tolerate.
It’s a bummer because every time I start somewhere new I start full of enthusiasm and slowly see it fade, even if my boss and coworkers can’t. I just want to like what I do enough to not dread it everyday or constantly see the moral failings that I can’t unsee in the places I work. I’m currently (at the time of writing this) in my round of sending out 13 job applications and switching careers entirely. I’m currently in social work but am looking to go to sales. The helping profession isn’t what I thought it would be, maybe one day I’ll return but for now I’m happy to try something different.
It’s weird being an adult and making choices, some family members are super supportive of me switching my jobs even if it means taking a temporary pay cut, others seem kind of disappointed in me for not sticking with it after the most recent incident that was the straw that broke the camel’s back for me. To be fair though, to her it seems like this came out of nowhere. Work is the least interesting thing about me and about my life and I’m ready for it to truly be that way. I hate complaining or talking about work in social situations so when people ask I say that it’s fine and I love it even if at the time I don’t 100% mean it.
I also have switched what I want to do with my life every four years since I was 5 years old, it’s something I just know about myself and why I chose to get a degree in psychology in the first place since I knew that if I wanted to switch careers in the future I’d be able to. I wanted to share this because if you’re in your early twenties and feel a little adrift, I don’t want you to feel alone.
Luna By The Lake With Cake 