It’s really interesting being a lifestyle Lolita these days, we’re definitely still around but not as much so anymore, it’s also harder to define as time goes on. I feel as if there is definitely a range of lifestyler but that mythic princess who wears her frills everyday is an inspiration to many of us. I wear Lolita about 3-5 times a week now but I’ve identified as a lifestyler for a long time and I think we go through cycles that are entirely normal for any interest!
Lolita Fashion is a demanding hobby whether you are a lifestyle lolita or not, and it can feel like to do it properly it has to be all consuming 100% of the time. This is simply not true and one of the reasons that I wrote in my princess code to not box yourself in. The idealized princess is an inspiration to my life but my clothes aren’t all that I am as a person, I am unique and dynamic and we should all share all parts of ourselves with the world if we see fit.
Lolita is a subculture through and through we have our own language and customs even. There are a lot of benefits to having such an extremely tight knit community, when there are outside threats lolitas band together in ways that is an honor to see. However one downside especially as someone who created Lolita fashion content online I see an encouragement to squash yourself down to one thing that I don’t see as much in other groups in Lolita fashion. If a creator wants to only share their lolita selves and keep the rest private that is entirely up to them! But for creators who create a lot of Lolita fashion content I often see some quiet judgement when they want to share other parts of themselves.
Also interests coming and going in cycles is entirely natural! I have been in lolita for over 5 years now and I’m on an interest upswing, I’ve been able to wear it more often than I don’t but sometimes I’m too tired and there’s nothing wrong with that. I also love sharing my love of cosplay and anime which is especially frowned upon in parts of the Lolita community even though for a lot of us we discovered Lolita fashion through those channels
I also feel a weird sense of a custodianship of our image that is unique to Lolita fashion. Rose Nocturnalia on YouTube made a great video about it. I think we need to learn to let go a little bit in this community of what the mainstream thinks of us. I get that we want our lives to be made easier but by the sheer nature of being alternative there are certain things mainstream people are never going to get and we shouldn’t turn on each other to try to be more accepted
Luna By The Lake With Cake 