This is a really interesting topic for me to cover and I have really complex feelings about it. This may not be a popular take and I acknowledge that. I think that Lolita Fashion has a purist culture problem. In multiple ways, I have found that if you like to produce lolita fashion content online showing interest in other niches will make you less popular or so it seems. There are ways to go about it and there are certainly efamous lolitas who are known for multiple things but some topics seem fairly off limits if you present yourself in lolita fashion on the internet. One of these is showing interest in anime and manga, a lot of times if you are a lolita on the internet who expresses interest in anime and manga outside of specific shoujo manga it can feel restrictive.
I identify as a lifestyle lolita and enjoy incorporating lolita fashion into as much of my life as possible but the community pressure in internet spaces to have lolita fashion become an all consuming part of your life can be pretty intense. I don’t see this sentiment as much in public places online but one quick look into behind the bows or cgl and these sentiments are pretty plain to see. There seems to be this pressure for lolitas to be pure maidens that never have any faults even though that is the antithesis of the core message of the subculture. We’re meant to be a space where anyone can be a princess regardless of personality, interests, or body type. I have also noticed pressure for those who publicly wear lolita fashion to keep their image “pure” in the sexual sense and this is where my thoughts get complicated.
Where I appreciate respecting the core beginnings of the fashion as a way to desexualize feminine presentations I don’t think people can be expected to be that way 24/7. For example, I don’t think that it’s a good idea for individuals to do fetish things online while wearing lolita or to expose minors to kink in fashion spaces. However, if people want to use their account to talk about anime characters they like or talk about celebrities they’re attracted to they shouldn’t be shamed for that. Wearing Lolita Fashion doesn’t dictate someone’s personality and there shouldn’t be the expectation that it should. No one owes you being your ideal maiden. Most people wear lolita fashion for themselves, I know I do. I choose to reach for being like what I consider to be an ideal princess because it makes me happy. Nobody owes me that and I don’t owe that to you. Let’s do what makes us happy as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone.
In conclusion, do what you want, but don’t expose minors to explicit material or the general public who hasn’t consented. That’s it. You want to tell me all about your favorite video games while wearing lolita fashion, go for it! Tell me about why you think moths are neat, go for it! Give me the entire history of the horror genre, I’d love to find out! Enjoy your fashion, but don’t restrict yourself.
Luna By The Lake With Cake 